Yes, Loneliness Is The Constant Companion Of The Artist

Of late, for a variety of reasons, this writer/singer/crocheter has been feeling the sting of loneliness. The whole thought is rather odd since I do not live alone, and do have regular contact with the outside world even not working in an office, but the lack of someone to talk to who will not judge started to wear in the last couple of weeks. As luck would have it, I had a weekend away in a quiet place to try to put the feeling behind me, but experience tells me it will return.

Why? Because the work of an artist - the actual hours spent creating, perfecting and polishing - art in multiple forms, is done alone, preferably with no extraneous noise, and no interruptions. And what's more, in today's work environment, that is an anathema to those with nothing but office experience.

The current bout of loneliness did not begin with writing, romance writing or anything of the sort. It began with the most selfish and demanding of all art forms, music. In a previous life and having a Queen of the Night range (that means all the REALLY high notes), I trained in classical singing. After leaving the flashy professional choruses and choirs behind - season after season of singing in two groups with a full time job was exhausting - my only music commitment is to the parish choir.

Well, long story short, we are preparing for a big concert during Lent, and yours truly is the main soloist, and possibly the only soloist, for a masterwork. I've been woodshedding the music, as we say, for weeks. Even longer story short, the date of said concert was revealed week before last: March 18. That means...I can't join the friends and family hoard headed for the St. Patrick's Day Parade. Either one of them. Due to the uncertainty of the weather, the three mile walk, yelling screaming and a fifth of Jameson...yeah, no. Not the day before the concert.

That didn't go over well with one person who decided to try and guilt me into going to the parade instead of singing the concert.

Sorry, but, no. These chances don't come along very often, and that is something the non-artist who disagreed with my choice did not understand.

And that was the beginning of the week of loneliness that went beyond being an artist. For days, I remembered the platonic friends I jettisoned, and the combination of mutual desire and interest that never materialized with all the guys I've known over the years. It may be out there, but at this point, there is no reason to sit by the phone. (And then there was the young adult group at church which I'm too old for. As if the singles in middle age aren't the better fundraising targets.)

On top of it, I can never seem to forget that the friends we make that are supposed to be the ones we know for life...my childhood group was gone before I was nine. Most of their dads were transferred away, and more than one set of parents split up. Not that most of them would have been artists or understanding of the loneliness dilemma. Okay, maybe a couple would. We were all in dance together.

This is the main pitfall of being an artist: a lack of someone to understand. If artists didn't love to create, there would be no art, loneliness and all. For us, it is all about feeding other people's souls by feeding and baring our own - and if that means skipping parades and letting friendships lapse, then so be it.

It is not something everyone understands.

Coming up:

November 2017 - At some point, I will put out my first mini-story (it's too long to be "short") titled "Secrets of the Bayou". It's not a full length book by any means, though. This mini takes place in Louisiana just a few years after the American government purchased it. It was inspired by a tour of Destrahan which is a plantation very close to New Orleans where I learned that much of what we know of historical slavery in the United States is distorted and leaves out a lot of historical detail.

December 2017 - By the 15th, Book 8 in the Turn My Head Series will be published. "High Maintenance" is the story of how Mickey Dolan figures out that his new hot shot interior designer, Tara McKenzie, may look like she's high maintenance, but really isn't.

January 2018 - "Turn My Head" the original should be published to Amazon. It will still be free, and I will let everyone know when that happens.

February 2018 - With all luck, the second "mini" titled "The Walkabout" should be published around the Feast of St. Valentine. This is the meeting of Manon Beauchamp and Stephen Pernoud. I apologize in advance for all the religious detail.

March 2018 - Book 9 in the "Turn My Head" series WILL be out by Holy Week. I have a concert to sing (see above), but Sean Dolan and Marianne Drummond were so much fun, I can't wait to dive back in, really serious topics as part of the plot and all.

As always, check my Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/PatriciaHoldenAuthor/ for updates, and more news.